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HaHA I beat the traffic police system and the stereotypes... I passed that damn practical driving test...Without having to wear skimpy clothes or bribery. Haha...
All I can say is: Leave it up to fate. Do good before your test. and ....Pray hard that you get a nice guy as your tester. Not Some old geezer who has an extra sensitive butt.
( I personally feel that I actually drove worst this time round. MY car jerked neurotically throughout the ride. The guy didn't even test me on my emergency brake technique. Haha...but I demonstrated it rather well on the road)
Well so 16 demerit points, and a WARNING to drive faster! Haha.....Sound advise. Will improve myself in that area. Vastly....
My Revenge Check list
1. Taxi Drivers Beware
hah! Dun think you're the only pple on the road capable of reckless lane changing and crazy horn beeping. Someone's gonna put you in your place! hahaha....*evil laughter*
2. Jaywalkers....pray hard
Those who think that their grandfathers own every single road in town...haha...change of Sovereignty. And anyway, those of you who teach your kids to run across the roads without checking for vehicles, a note of reminder, life, believe it or not, is more valuable than any sum of cash you're gonna receive from the insurance company.
3. Ah bengs and Ah Siah kia ( Rich man's son ).... hope your daddy's car is well insured
All I can say is that...well...everyone has got fingers to use as they wish. SO just as you can manipulate your fingers, so can others. BTW get a room if u and your beau wish to indulge in some TLC ( in every sense of the word)
Hell's Angels just upgraded to cars and they're in Singapore!
Cheerio!
Tuesday, June 29, 2004
Hi everybody! Hi Dr. Chua! yup! everyone say hi to Dr. Chua! Just realised after today's meeting that there are 'invisible' audience at this here blog. haha! the omnipresent as they say. WEll, always glad for an increase in readership. It's a world where ratings count. Dun worry you all! The content on these pages will never change. 
Yeah, so went back to SGH to discuss the paper. discovered that the deadline for abstract submissions was postponed to july the 9th. haha...added time for procrastination. Well, thankfully I already finished the outline for the abstract because with everyone deserting at this point in time I would have been left high and dry. Aargh!! To all of you I'll get my revenge. haha....maybe I'll just escape without letting anyone know. Hey Kor! Planning to visit you! Better have your house all made up and furnished by the time I get there! haha....I'm a tough customer to please. I can't help it I had a society full of excellent tutors.
So once again the infamous question, heard it on the first day we met to discuss the project and heard it now and again: Dr. Howe's "Do you have a life?" question. ( ALso comes in version " Are you having a life?" ) 
Sigh...how apt a question. Each time it's asked, I'm thinking--Socrates "An unexplained life is not worth living " Much as I would like to equate gaseous exchange of oxygen and carbon dioxide and brain activity as living and having a 'life'. I do think there's supposed to be a deeper meaning to the word 'life' (Aaaargh!!!...must strive to think out of the box! Must not be close minded! Must not think like a Singaporean!!!! But it's my liberty right?? That's for another discussion)
That question is unanswerable. I wouldn't be doing my favourite philosopher Ol' Soc justice if I didn't ponder and question myself. To me, an unexplained life is not life because life is unique to one and all and if you can't explain wat you're dong here than it's just pure existence. I'm not going to settle for that. SO as all of you know, I'm still trying to figure out what the hell am I doing here? I dunno...but I do know that answer does not lie on these sandy shores. Actually, I think that ironically enough my 'life' here has already been systematically 'explained' and dictated. So well...with whatever semblance of an individualistic mind I have left I am going to refute that explanation. So well, yeah...still searching for that explanation which will take a life time to answer. So...guess I won't be answering that question anytime soon Dr. Howe. haha...I'd like to find the answer myself.
Cheers!!!
Sunday, June 27, 2004
Hey guess wat guys! A new ReveLation!!! We are a race of people greater than any other race. Ad. infinitum. I like to wonder why we dun realli pay much attention to human rights or for that matter comment on an international scale about matters regarding human rights. Yea yea..so this is kinda like touchy and sensitive issues. But grow up, issues are issues and they are here to stay so let's try to be the big boys we love to act like and address the issue.
Well, so I was driving along Ang Mo Kio today. Guess wat I saw that was as arresting as the red light i was held up at. Just directly opposite the junction a rather interesting enactment was taking place. A girl, of about 5 to 6 years of age ws trying desperately to clamber onto her maid's back. Well, surely there shouldn't be too much of a trouble, dun u think. Why? Because that's wat we're paying these foreign help for: To help look after the kids and support (physically) them so that they can conserve energy from physical movement and concentrate all of it on serious mental work a.k.a mugging. TO make matters worst, the maid was already lugging two big red plastic bags. People, if that maid had managed to piggyback that girl properly supporting her bum with both hands and still manage to carry those two plastic bags and with the additional feat of walking back home, I believe, ladies and gentlemen that I would have
had experienced a miracle, 3 miracles in fact: A lady with four arms, bones of steel and having the stregth of goliath. What made the picture so perfectly in the singa-style was the fact that, 2 metres down the path was the mother of the delicate child, swaggering ahead with nothing much upon her lest for a tiny tote bag. After, having realised that she had left her delicate bundle of joy some 2m behind her, she triapsed back, and promptly questioned why the maid wasn't carrying the girl. All the maid could do was to shrug and smile sheepishly. Well, so that was the drama that I experienced for the timespan of a red light and a drive past the junction.
Someone tell me why am I so fascinated by this? That's right, I shouldn't be. It's going on and on every single day in every single corner of Singapore. IT's our culture and guess wat! It's our liberty to do so!
Liberty No.2: As Singaporeans we are almighty and have every single god-given right to exert our dominance over others weaker our clearly at our mercy. Failure to fully utilise our hired help in every single possible will result in our being mocked by our peers for having gotten the rotten end of the deal.
When questioned on how our acts are justified, the response should more often than not be ( now evryone together ) " But we pay for it what!"
Yeah, we'll pay for it one day.
Friday, June 25, 2004
GUYS! THE GREAT DEPRESSION IS HERE!!!!
Don't you just hate it when people start pushing their responsibilities onto you? Or when people suspect you of not doing your job when you have been doing it diligently? And worst of all, dun you hate it when pple lose faith in your ability to get a good job done, just because of some schemy piece of turd?
Well, I don't know about you guys but let me tell you something...I am getting really tired and depressed about being here. I am bored outta my brains. There's nothing nice to do around here and frankly speaking, this sense of redundancy really stinks.
Sure, so I maybe I could go out or something. BUt...going out just increases the
sense of desperation to escape. Ah bengs, Ah lians, Ah sohs, Tai Tais, Fakos, Arrogant pricks...all these things are really getting to me now. I really don't understand why Singaporeans have to continuously act like people they are not. I really dun see the point in having all these campaigns on being one people one nation, embracing our heritage, developing our culture and being creative and cultivating so many god gamn hubs in here. We can't even deal with our identity crisis as it is! One word: KIASU
Staying at home also doesn't help the problem. Why? Because with the great and extensive developments in communicative forms of technology a.k.a email and internet, as well as ever invasive media, I will never be able to escape idiots. Sometimes I feel like smashing my handphone so I dun have to field irritating calls of absolute nonsense.
Those of you who know of anyone seeking tutors from agencies..dun trust them. For unscruples means of earning money ( why is always abt earning money with us? )these agency will actually lie unabashedly about the qualifications of their tutors. Sick isn't it? And think about it in Singapore where it's all abt academics, getting a lousy tutor who'll screw you up for your exams, and for that matter your whole life just for a few damn dollars. We really should just screw those courtest ads, and being a gracious society. We can't even behave like decent human beings for goodness sake. Man...the way we scheme and plot to bring ourselves forward in this rat race really wipes the humanity from us.
Well...To all you bloody Schemers!!!!! Here's Lily Tomlin in your FAcE!!!
" It DOesn't Matter if we win or lose in the RAT Race, because in the end YOU'RE STILL A RAT."
Thursday, June 24, 2004
My inner child is ten years old!
Well, since everyone is having them on their blogs. Andrea, Janise, Meg....man...I'm lining them up in alphabetical order.
How to make a Esther Tan Xi Xiang Ingredients:
5 parts intelligence
1 part humour
1 part energyMethod:
Layer ingredientes in a shot glass. Add a little lustfulness if desired!
Personality cocktail
From Go-Quiz.com
Lustfulness? I wonder for wat? *sigh*
Probably something I'll never get.
Cheers you all! 
Hiez you all! Been real bored and close to nearly suicidal with boredom. I'm doing crazy things.
Just yesterday, I suddenly had a sudden desire to own a new and exotic pet. I was sufing the pet classifieds online and I actually emailed someone regarding the purchase of some sugar gliders : they're really cute soft fuzzy mammals which you can find in rainforests. As their name suggests, their staple diet is actually sugar. They lick the sweet flesh of fruits e.g. mango, rambutan, etc. and nectar from fruits. Thet're are really super cute like bush babies. Well, I actually got a reply regarding them. they cost $300 for all 3. Rather good buy I should think. But then again I dunno how they are gonna be shipped over. Oooooh....so close yet so far.
Well, I've also always wanted to keep some kinda reptile. SO I was thinking somewhere along snakes 
or lizards
. I used to keep newts, but they grew kinda big so their now probably, proliferating in the waters of Pierce. Well, so I searched online trying to see if there were any dealers in snakes or reptiles in Singapore but couldn't find any. But I did find many posts on reptile community sites regarding proper care of snakes. hmmm....wonder where they get their snakes from. Well, so spurred by promises of a supposed "Biggest Pet Store in Singapore" the 'Pet Safari' over at East point mall, all the way to SiMeI....can you beat it? 1.5 hours in transport all the way there, just to wonder around a short stretch of pet shops which sold overpriced, fluffy creatures! BuMMeR!!! Dun even talk abt the mall, it was BOriNg! I was disappointed.
Yeah, so guys I'm bored, bored, bored. I have rubbish to do now. And I have to deal with idiots for that matter, which doesn't help at all. Dun you hate it when someone you HAVE to work with goes around bleating on others in the team. Nobody likes tittle-tattlers. Especially, arrogant stupid pple. Just kills the joy from doing the job. Sorry guys for not being able to get some controversial articles out now. Will work on it. Just irritated with lotsa things now. Depression setting in again. *Sigh*
Alright then advertisement time.: I want to watch Michael Chiang's play PRIVATE PARTS. hey! It isn't everyday that you can something as 'controversial' ( by Singaporean standards ) as this I suppose. SO those of you who want to watch it with ME ( going at a long shot here...) please let me know either via this blog, email, or handphone. Please do it soon. I wanna try to get the tickets for either the 28th or 29th of July. I'm open to date bargain. Hope to be able to book those tickets whilst their having those 20% discounts. Pls let me know wat priced tickets you guys wish to have. Haha....I can't believe I'm actually advertising for company. Well, anyway, if no one's interested I'll go watch it myself.
Okie! going to bed now. Man..it's early. But there's nothing else to do.
Cheers!
Sunday, June 20, 2004
I ate GAstrOPods tonight. I will never look at snails in the same way ever again.
Well, I suppose the next time I see them, they'll appear to be covered in roast garlic, butter and spice. Mind Games. Well yea, so anyway, just a reminder to those of you who are wonderin around at Kallang Theatre and wondering where to get a bite. DO noT! I repeat Do NoT! Eat at Le Grande international ( I can't really remember the name. It's insignificant) Well just the general run down abt tonight's father's day dinner:
The food was bad, bad, bad. The garlic bread was more like garlic rocks. You could hear them clatter as they dropped onto your plate. The fries were either rock hard or limpid. Okay so the seafood selection was not too bad. Well, guess that would be to my father's benefit. Hai...sad sad sad. The xiao long bao was stiff. and worst of all! there's wasn't any soup in the bao. *SObZ* The orange juice had red bits floating in it, so I had to get a new glass. Hope there wasn't anything else organic mixed in the juice. (eg. spit, sweat, nose hair, boogers
)
Well, so I basically plied on soup, sesame paste, drink, salads, ice cream, and SNails. If I develop a craving for them or am reincarnated as some sorta slippery, oozy slug in the future.....I'm suing.
Cheers and Good Nite! Thanks for tuning into this boring edition. I just needed to increase the number of 'eye' witnesses (pun intended if you get it otherwise NVM) for the pending law suit.
Wednesday, June 16, 2004
A Tribute to Quizzes.... ( and along the way a tribute to those who keep sending them to me )
Alright, so I'm guessing that you guys are probably wondering 'Has she gone off her rockers to be actually paying tribute to crap? Where's the low down on conspiracy theories and our daily treatment of nit-picking?!'
My Response: Chill it guys! Everyone has to have some time off to act normal and be as bimbotic and redundant as society wants us to be you know. SO I don't care how this is going to affect my ratings but here it is...
Hey! Look on the bright side: If you should feel bored or annoyed at any time during the tribute you can always click on one of those snazzy links and be transported outta this crappy article. That's InteracTIvE FuN for YA! ChEErS!!
Okay so if you thought this was gonna be a long narrative or descriptive on quizzes...YOU are so wrong. This is instead gonna be a narcissistic tribute to myself with quizzes aiding in my presentation. Let's Get Down to It!
For all you 'adoring' fans out there who have been ensnared by the long tales I've weaved, and have constantly shown loyalty to this blog, I do believe that this word best describes my work here....
You're an Angst writer!
What kind of writer are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
YES!!! I'm an ANGST writer! I've always wanted to be one! Finally I have the personality to match. MAn...believe me these quizzes are super accurate. Scouts Honour: I did those quizzes myself.
Well, alright so there are some discrepancies in the frequency of accuracy of some of these quizzes. A very apt example would be this next one. I'm rather embarassed by this: I wrongly disgnosed my psychiatric condition! YipEs! But..maybe... just maybe (fingers crossed on this one): I might have both disorders.
Here's the quiz's verdict on my actual condition:
paranoid
Which Personality Disorder Do You Have?
brought to you by Quizilla
I actually kinda resent what they said. I AM CALM and very Collected! Sure, I believe there are certain conspiracy theories out there but I'm sane enough (or not?)
to know that not every one is out to get me. IF I had thought so, this blog wouldn't be enough for my griping. But anyways...I think there is some kinda statistical error, the percentage (not percentile) of people out to get me is DEFIniTely NOT 1%~! Why am I sure?! If you don't know why then you probably haven't understood a single word I've type in this blog. I don't know whether I oughta welcome you or ban you. GO FIGURE!!! 
Alright next thing about me is something I get rather sensitive about. It's something my parents like to say about me. They say that I'm very 'children gas'. OK! before you guys think that's obscene or anything, well sorry to burst your bubble! It ain't! It's merely xiao hai zi qi! A.k.a childish. HAHA....can you believe it? Me! childish.....BLEarGH! That's absurd. My inner child's only TEN so that's like, just 9 years shy of what my birth cert would tell you?
The adult world is pretty irrelevant to me. Whether
I'm off on my bicycle (or pony) exploring, lost
in a good book, or giggling with my best
friend, I live in a world apart, one full of
adventure and wonder and other stuff adults
don't understand.
How Old is Your Inner Child?
brought to you by Quizilla
I think that Says it All...well at least a good deal of it.
I suppose, I'm appearing to be more and more like a vindictive, highstrung, couldn't care less individual, which perhaps I may be. At times. But then again, perhaps it's really difficult for anyone to be truly understood. We are after all just pawns on the chess board.....actors on the stage.
Morpheus
?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla
" We grow great by dreams. All big men are dreamers. They see things in the soft haze of a spring day or in the red fire of a long winter's evening. Some of us let these great dreams die, but others nourish and protect them; nurse them through bad days till they bring them to the sunchine and light which comes always to those who sincerely hope that their dreams will come true." --Woodrow Wilson
Window? What Window?
ghost
Ghost or spirit: You are a lost soul. Very calm and
sweet, you are often the one who asks: What if?
With a clever mind, you want to explore the
world on a different level. Without the
answers, you aren't ready to move on. You are
most likely very creative and find yourself
thinking things through on a different level
**Where will you go when you die?**(now with pics)
brought to you by Quizilla
What's the point in thinking at a different level? If it isn't on the RIGHT level or the SaME level as what people expect then there's no point in wasting your time thinking. Might as well do things the way they were dictated to be done. Can't risk being called a rebel in this system.
Your a Guradian Angel! Guardian Angels are also
knows as Warrior Angels, because they are the
army of God. Not always meaning that they are
in war, simply that their job is to protect
unwary humans from dark dragons, or other evil
demons. Warrior Angels are not always friendly
with humans, but they will watch over them all
the time. Humans say that when a miracle
happens, thank your guradian angel.
What Kind of ANGEL are you? (For Girls only) This Quiz has amazingly Beautiful Pictures!
brought to you by Quizilla
To the staunch catholics, christians or religious, forget you even read the above. Yeah....it's kinda blasphemous even by my standards. The picture is downright gross as well. But then again the idea is rather passable. I do believe in guardian angels. And maybe there really is some kinda high power and angelic host preventing us from destroying and beating each other to pulp. I don't think humans as an infantile species are able to exert self control or mutual respect and understanding.
So much for evolution.
Well then I suppose that's enough about myself. Haha...dun worry you haven't been exposed to anything about me after all. Aren't they just quizzes? My friend Gen says "Life is what you make of it." (okay gen I mentioned u. Happy?!) Well, so just for today: Life is made of quizzes. Hey, we live in a quizzical world after all right?
So to all you asses who don't buy this, or are no longer around. I'm gonna say something that will probably ban this blog from public viewership (s'pore) and have it rated as having mature content:
your fuck.
What swear word are you?
brought to you by Quizilla
One more thing about me...
You have a free soul! As all the souls go, yours is
the most free-spirited and adventurous. You
like camping, hiking, or interaction with other
people. Your a social butterfly, but not
because of your style, but because of your
willingness to communicate with everyone. You
probably have close friends who can rely on you
because you always seem to know whats going on
in the world. You love music and are
free-spirited and someone fun to be around. A
born leader and great explorer-dont ever
change-the world needs more people like you.
What Kind of SOUL do you posses? (For Girls only) Incredible Anime Pictures!
brought to you by Quizilla
THat'S RIGhT at YOU!!!
Sunday, June 13, 2004
The ARTs FesTIvaL is really depleting me financial resources people! 
Just spent $44 to get my ears blown off whilst watching contemporary flamenco dance. 
Thanks Gen for getting front row seats at the corner right smack infront of those massive speakers. Guess it's partly me and meg's fault for not replying decisively enough on whether or not we wanted to watch the performance. But then again, they weren't too bad. It's not every performance where you get to be so so close and intimate to the performers on stage yeah?
Alright, intimate not to mean we actually managed to get back stage passes or one on one time with the performers. Intimate a.k.a able to hear their panting
( or was it gasping?.... thanks to those massive speakers ) and able to see the fine spray of sweat or hair spray water each time those eye candy boys spun and twisted their bodies around. Mmmmm......
Alright so I'm not gonna brag about the superb 2 and a half hour feast of gorgeous dudes I had ( they were so cute....
*sigh*), but rather comment on this truly superb performance. It was superb not only because of the spectacular performance put up by the performers but because of the general environment where we were sitting this night.
On the performance of the performers ( local acts you could actually learn a thing or two from them )....
I admit I'm no connoisseur of the art of dance but that's the beauty of this peformance: I feel that even the layman wanting to experience dance or even art would have been able to identify with the performance. It was fluid, exciting and there was an interactive blend between dance and music. Most importantly there is an interesting blend of cultures and genres. The band was made up of: An indian tabla
(2 headed drum) and other indian percussion instruments, a classical grand piano, classical guitar, electric cello and double bass, as well as two singers. And they were all able to work together to give a stunning performance which totally complemented the dancers. I've seen dance performances before and one thing I can't stand is when the dance and music is completely out of phase. It's jarring on the nerves, all the irregularity. In this performance, the dancers felt the music, the musicians accomodated the dancers and the audience were treated to a breathtaking display of artistry and passion.
ALright now onto to the next point that made my experience there rather gripeless ( is there such a word? well guess that's wat you call writer's license).
I guess that the quote "you pay for what you get" is rather apt in usage in this case. Although I do personally feel that there isn't much of a co-relation between price of tickets and the kind of people you are to partake the evening with, experience has sort of made me beg to differ.
Maybe I was already deaf by the second dance piece but I was surprisingly pleased to note that there were not any stray noises (a.k.a chatting, dumb remarking. etc. ) and cellular phone fondling ( yes love, cellular phones are supposed to be the legally correct term for handphone) Everyone was observing proper theatre etiquette and enjoying what they had paid good money to watch, however, the most important thing was that ( in truly un-singaporean style i think)everyone was kind and generous enough to allow their fellow audience enjoy wat they had also paid good money to watch.
WEll, so you may think I'm overly sensitive ( again?
) but man I'm sick of paying good money to go to a performance and having the entire experience destroyed by some selfish bugger. You do know who these people are right?
Here's a list to jog your memory. IF You remember any others that I have missed out please do tell me. DO your part for the community's sake!
1. HAndPhone(it's easier for pple to relate if I use this term) FondLerS: 
People who switch their phones to silent mode but do not realise that in the near total darkness the beam of light that is emitted from that wretched device is equally as distracting as whispered chatter. The newer the model, the worse the effect: the handphones actually look like miniature UFOS landing in the palm of their hands.
Another errant subgroup in this category would be the people who actually ANSWER their calls in the middle of the performance. They believe that they are able to carry out a conversation at frequencies way below our listening range. Well, to all those guilty as charged: NO you are not able to do that. ANd further more, you are certainly not discussing some fascinating state-secret so NOBODY wants to hear your conversations and having puccini or verdi punctuated with your wretched conversation. WE live in difficult times and Art performances are luxuries some of us can ill afford. If we wanted to pay $79.00 to come listen to nonsensical chatter, we would just have to go to our nearest kopitiam or market for some gossip fest.
2. SmaRT AleCKs: 
These are the kind of people who have strong faith and belief in their knowledge on what ever art form is being performed. But, if you have read my previous article regarding the liberties of Singaporean ( get used to the idea, we do have those liberties) the louder they speak of their so called 'cleverness' the higher the probability of their speech being utter rubbish. Watching Ten Tenors at the esplanade was like watching Ten Tenors with One Idiot. To that guy who I was so unfortunate to have to sit two seats away from " YOU KNOW CRAP ABOUT OPERA MUSIC SO SHUT UP!" 
Apparently, Mr. 'AleCK' ( his name is SmaRT ) was trying to impress his girlfriend. Gal you must be both blind and non-cognitive to actually go out with this guy. The only thing that any other male could have learnt from this 'man' would be : Figure hugging TURtlENecKs are absolute NO NOs for someone without the stature or physique. Fake, Rojak accents(you know the kinda accent where you just can't place it as American, Aussie or British or any other foreign accent? ) are very good for hilarious digs but not for communication's sake.
A person who really understands and appreciates the performance will keep his or her mouth shut and enjoy the performance in its entirety before actually DiScuSsinG it during the intermission or after the entire performance. That's because they can actually remember what's good about the performance as they were smart enough to pay attention to it.
3. The ConverSAtionAList:
Where is the most perfect place to hold a conversation? I dunno. But from what I've experienced and Heard...the Esplanade theatre and concert halls are the best places. I suppose the fact that you pay , oh say, anywhere from $20 to $250 makes this airconditioned facility a perfect setting for uselesss conversation. Oh...and of course there's the fantastic background music and light entertainment. All I have to say is that these people are either mad or filthy rich. Brings a whole new understanding of someone being insanely rich.
4.The CriTiCIseR: 
So there may be some ARts magazine editor or otherwise amongst the audience but I wouldn't think that anyone could come out with as apt and literal an analysis as those I've heard from my seat. They are the people who screw up their faces in absolute disgust and criticise why twentieth century music is dissonant and irrevocably unharmonised, complain that Romantic music is too sleep inducing and laughs at the performer who deeply engrossed in his or her music sways together with it. I am speechless.
SO here's a big thank you all who made Sunday's performance fantastic and memorable! You've renewed my dying faith in the Art of Performance Viewing.
CheeRs!